WARNING: This article contains small-town humor.
Date: 16:31:20 10/08/21
Officer: Monson, D2
Disp: LODI POLICE DEPARTMENT RESCUED A KITTEN STUCK IN A STORM DRAIN WITH THE HELP OF LODI CITIZENS.
No injuries were reported for either the officer or the civilians.
The Lodi Valley Chronicle commends the valiant police on their heroic work. We do however, wonder if the budget needs to be increased in order to bring in an expert who can provide more training on kitten rescuing, so they need not draft unskilled civilians into such a precarious situation.
The fact that things like this end up on the blotter–and the fact that I know everyone on the Lodi Police are going to shake their heads and laugh at this article (and give me shit for it) rather than get angry–is one of the things that we should be thankful for.
We live in a community where the biggest complaint from the new officers is that their hand gets tired from waving back to people.
So… be sure to commend Officer Danial Monson on his heroic rescue (scared kittens are little shredding machines!) and give a friendly greeting or a sincere thank you to any of the officers you see.
Donations of Icy-Hot to sooth wrists that are sore from waving may also be appreciated.
A Lodi native, Blaze attended the University of Wisconsin, Green Bay where he graduated with a degree in theatre technology & design. He has traveled extensively throughout the United States and the world–including a 6-year stint in China. He has been a teacher, a writer, a designer, and is the founder of the Redleaf Consulting Group.